On a Saturday afternoon this past April, Austin's singer/songwriter Joe McDermott had just finished a concert for a group of exuberant children at Georgetown's Community Montessori School, when a man approached him. "You are a part of our family lore," the man explained as he shook McDermott's hand. "My son grew up listening to your music, and we're always quoting your songs when we find ourselves in similar situations."
Indeed McDermott's music has provided a soundtrack to the lives of many young people throughout central Texas and beyond. His songs range in topic from the wild and whimsical (such as having a helicopter as a family car or bringing home a skunk for a pet), to moving ballads about growing up and experiencing life's simple joys, making him a hit with parents and children alike.
McDermott, a father of three sons, began performing music for young people when he worked as the director of the Phoenix School, an Austin preschool he co-founded in 1985. By 1986 he had released a compilation of his own songs in a cassette titled "Eeny Meeny Miny Joe," and was becoming a popular performer at schools, festivals, and other child-centered events. McDermott's reputation as a musician soon reached the ears of Stan and Jan Berenstain, authors of the popular Berenstain Bear books. After listening to his recordings, the Berenstains asked McDermott to set 10 of their books to music. His compositions were released as part of a multi-media package in 1994. Three years later his CD "I Am Baby" won a Parents Choice Award. His follow-up CD, "Great Big World" came out last December.
Not only does McDermott strive to enhance and enchant the lives of young people through his music, as the father of three sons, he also knows firsthand the demands of parenting and the challenges that stem from balancing family and career. Recently Austin Family sat down with the daddy musician to talk to him about fatherhood, music, and the marriage between the two.
AF: How has being a father changed your life?
JM: Having taught preschool for many years before having kids, I was pretty used to being around children already. What really changed things for me was that feeling of total responsibility and love that you feel for your child. When Max, my eldest, was born it really made life a lot more serious and real for me, but also a lot more wonderful. I think men are fairly simple machines. We don't really have the rituals of manhood any more to signify the change from boy to man. I think having your heart broken once or twice and having a child is about as good as it gets.
AF: How has being a father affected the way your view your career?
JM: I always thought of children as important, but after having children of my own I realized just how important they are and how important it is to try and maintain that innocence they have. As a parent I see how much stuff children are exposed to, both good and bad, and I really enjoy being able to give something positive for them to be exposed to.
AF: What do you do to handle the stress of parenting?
JM: I really try to remember that the younger guys won't be little that much longer. Having a child is one of the most challenging experiences a person has. It's so stressful and yet it's really a very small percentage of our lives. It's over before you know it and once it's gone it's gone. That thought usually helps me slow down and appreciate the moment.
AF: What resources helped you most as a parent?
JM: Teaching really helped. I trained under a wonderful Montessori teacher named Leo Nitch at Athena Montessori (which was in Tarrytown until 1985). He taught me so much about children. Leo had an almost twisted sense of humor and the children loved him. My parents had me when they were older and they were very "old school" so Leo really taught me how fun it is to be around kids.
AF: What are the most important family times, those that make memories?
JM: For us it's almost always humor. We keep a book of funny things the kids say.
AF: How do you bring music into the lives of your sons, and how can non-musical parents bring music into their children's lives?
JM: Well, my kids have no choice - it's just all around them. Louise and I sing all the time and so do the kids. As far as non-musical parents, the only thing I can say is that children are naturally musical. I would think that exposing them to a variety of music would be a good thing. I would also think that buying a Joe McDermott CD for every room in the house would be a good idea.
AF: What is the most important thing your wife does for you that helps you as a dad?
JM: She really loves me. That makes everything go smoother.
AF: Where do you get ideas for your songs?
JM: I think most of my ideas come from listening to people and observing situations. When I listen to people talk my brain ties the words together in funny ways. I usually just get a main idea from that and run with it. There are however those rare moments of pure inspiration. I was in the yard once smashing flower pots with a brick and just about broke my foot. That one wrote itself.
AF: What do you think is your best song and why?
JM: Probably "Great Big World." I was really trying to write a song about discovery and change but a little sadness sort of crept in unconsciously. It's great to grow and explore but you lose something too. As you show your child the world for the first time it's so exciting and yet you are showing them the world that they will eventually go into. That unique and precious world you share now gives way to something else.
AF: What are your guiding principles that help you stay positive about children and the future?
JM: I firmly believe that the world hasn't really changed that much. Sure, there are more of us and we definitely tax the resources more but I think the proportion of "good" and "bad" people is about the same as it always was. I think children introduce a constant renewal to the system by reminding us of why we're really alive. Children know so much more about happiness than we do. Every so often someone will say, "You really know how to control children" and I always think to myself, "No, I'm just happy to be here and they know it."
Jennifer Ziegler is a freelance writer and mother of two. She has published three young adult paperback novels under the name Lynn Mason.